初爲人母、初爲人父,你還記得那些不經意就溜走的小時光嗎?爲人父母才會懂的這29樣事情,你還記得嗎?
1. “等等,你這就讓我們跟寶寶回家啦?就我們自己?!” (真的就是這種感覺,因爲害怕自己當年還硬生生地在醫院多住了一天。。。)
1. “Wait, you’re just sending us home with this baby? Alone?!”
2. 請求你的婆婆過來幫你們帶娃娃!(雖然有所顧忌,可是那個時候見到長輩就會有種莫名的安全感,自己實在是新手啊~)
2. Actually begging your mother-in-law to visit — she can help with the baby!
3. 恨不得一小時檢查327遍確認你家寶寶還有呼吸(真的是這樣,超害怕的說)
3. Checking 327 times an hour to make sure your newborn is breathing.
4. 開車回家的時候慢地像蝸牛一樣(一直叫的士司機開慢點開慢點)
4. Driving 12 mph on the way home from hospital. On the Interstate.
5. 身心俱累以至于連自己的名字還有你父母的名字都忘了(這個倒沒有,今天星期幾、幾月幾號、甚至是年份是都不太記得)
5. Exhaustion so great you forget your own name. And your partner’s name too.
6. 欣喜地打開紙尿布濕細心檢查你家寶寶便便的顔色(嗯,這個必須的,每次都要檢查,不管有多臭,可以對著金黃色大便笑開花)
6. Opening a diaper gleefully so you can discover what color your baby’s poop is this time.
7. 每天自己都要默默感受一下你上次餵奶餵的是哪邊(經常啊 ,就是記不住)
7. Feeling yourself up multiple times a day to determine from which side you last fed your baby.
8. 産後腸胃不適上廁所感到非常害怕(不管是順産還是破腹産媽媽都會很害怕這個的,你懂~)
8. The terror of your first postpartum bowel movement.
9. 寶寶第一個笑容讓你瞬間high了,比什麽藥都管用(第一個笑容到現在還是記憶猶新啊,還有那神奇完美的笑聲)
9. Baby’s first smile resulting in a high better than any known drug.
10. 半夜3點在床上爭吵到底該誰起床去哄娃(大部分時間當然是媽媽起來咯,可是真的有一些時候是在計較的,實在太累了)
10. Keeping a running mental tally of whose turn it is to get up with the baby at 3 a.m.
11. 站著洗澡都能睡著(都是閉著眼睛的,恨不得用洗澡的時間來睡覺)
11. Falling asleep standing up in the shower.
12. 一不小心就跟陌生人說起自己家娃娃的屎尿屁,甚至拉著還沒有小孩的陌生人叨叨叨(突然有一次自己意識到怎麽跟同事也不停地說起寶寶的大便來了,當場就有點尴尬)
12. The ease of discussing your child’s bodily fluids with perfect strangers. Even childless strangers.
13. 放棄跟朋友或者公司組織的娛樂活動,回家聞聞寶寶的小香頭(跟朋友出去放松是種奢望,出去了也會急急忙忙回家)
13. Willingly giving up happy hour to go home and smell your baby’s head.
14. 有一張詳細的表格記錄寶寶每天尿尿、大便次數和喝多少奶(這個還真有,從出生開始,堅持到7、8個月。。。)
14. Keeping a spreadsheet of how many times per day your new baby pees, poops, and eats.
15. 躺在沙發上抱著寶寶,一點都不敢動彈生怕把寶寶弄醒了(不能動啊~~)
15. Being trapped on the couch under a sleeping baby you are terrified to wake.
16. 甯願睡覺也不要親熱(這個難道不是麽)
16. Choosing sleep over sex.
17.把整個月的工資都花在了嬰兒車上(這個倒沒有,有的舉個手)
17. Spending an entire month’s salary on a stroller.
18. 半夜大聲吆喝“這次不是輪到我”,然後還是起床哄娃了(大聲吆喝倒沒有,不情不願睡眼朦胧倒是經常)
18. Screaming “IT’S NOT MY TURN” to get up with the baby in the middle of the night.
19. 頭四天就用到一個G的內存卡(手機內存嚴重不夠用啊)
19. Filling a one-gigabyte memory card with photos from your baby’s first four days of life.
20. 在抱寶寶前,讓來訪者用洗手液吸手,恨不得讓他們穿上防護服(還真有說過,“要抱寶寶的請先洗下手,謝謝~”)
20. Asking visitors to wash and sanitize their hands — and maybe don a hazmat suit — before holding the new baby.
21. 每隔三分鍾會腦補寶寶發生各種小意外的畫面,並且感到害怕和焦慮(一點事情沒安排好就會禁不住腦補各種嚇人的場面)
21. Experiencing the fear at least every three minutes that you are doing it all wrong.
22. 拒絕相信在我眼皮地下從一個小不點長大的你日後可能會變成一個邋遢、愛生氣的青少年,還會被說“你不懂我”(這個還真沒想過,因爲很難相信啊!)
22. Refusing to believe this wee baby will ever grow up to be a messy, sullen teenager who thinks you know nothing.
23. 一直在看熟睡中的寶寶,百看不膩啊(睡著的瓜瓜真的是天使,好看,怎麽看都不膩)
23. Spending hours contentedly watching your baby sleep.
24. 碰到有年齡相仿孩子的家長就會異常興奮,盡管你們沒有什麽其他的共同點(秒熟~)
24. The excitement of meeting someone with a baby the exact same age as yours, despite having nothing else in common.
25. 隊友在家帶娃,自己去超市購物,極其自由自在啊(偷得浮生半日閑~)
25. Stealing alone time by going to the grocery store and leaving the baby with your partner.
26. 突然間就想寶寶了,直接丟下裝滿物品的購物車奔回家(這個到沒有,可是每天下班回家都是著急的~)
26. Leaving your cart in aisle seven and running out of the store because you miss your baby so much.
27. 都不記得自己是從什麽時候開始叫另一半爸爸、媽媽,而不是原來的名字(現在經常說“爸爸,抱一下寶寶”)
27. Trying to remember when you started calling your partner “Mommy” or “Daddy” instead of their proper name.
28. 花了一整個晚上討論上幼兒園的事情,盡管上幼兒園是3年以後的事情(最近在熱烈地討論上小學的事情啊~雖然還真的有4年半才到)
28. Spending your entire date night discussing preschool options, despite the fact preschool is three years away.
29. 幸福感滿滿,准備要二胎(坦白說,真的有這個強烈想法~)
29. Deciding things are so great with this baby that you’re totally going to have another.
看著這些漫畫我又重新回顧了這一路走來的美好點滴~
不知不覺我們竟然帶著寶寶走了那麽遠的路~前面會有更多的美好等著我們~
圖片來自:
http://www.healthline.com/health/new-parent/would-understand
(感謝作者授權新加坡眼發布,微信公衆號:小廣成長記)